Hello, my reindeer! I’m good, but you know, a bad thing always happens when my life is getting better.
I’m gonna start with the good news. I gave math and oral exams for ELTE. Now, I have nothing to do but only wait. I’m almost confident that I will pass:) I’m also doing great in my studies. I spend most of my study time on ‘Engineer Math’, which is the hardest one. The programming course is continuing, and it is getting harder.
After I read “Mindset”, my desire to challenge myself increased. Doing the thing I am already good at over and over is non-creative. Even if I may fail, I want to experience different things, learn something new, and improve myself in many ways. Since all people say that soft skills are crucial, I must develop my EQ by reading books and useful news, listening to podcasts, watching documentaries, writing, and communicating. I want to become a person who has great knowledge in many sectors, just like my dad.
I found the biggest reason I was feeling lonely. The culprit is social media. The book “Deep Work” explains why we should ignore social media and how it debilitates our efficiency. Social media platforms make me feel bad about myself. Then, why do I still have to use these toxic things? I stopped being active on my Instagram for a month and now I feel less lonely and my self-confidence improved. I don’t see flawless people and I can’t know when my friends are hanging out without telling me. I sign in to my IG only on Saturdays to reply to DMs and see some posts.
One of my goals for this year, doing an internship, is taking place! I am an intern at Lemon Press, the coolest media company. It is very interesting to see how the workers get along with each other, what pushes them to be creative every day, and how the email newsletters, social posts, videos, and deals are made. There are many things to learn from them. My job is to be responsible for the social media of Inside Mongolia. IM is a brother of LP (I would say). It is an email newsletter about news reports of Mongolia. To say the truth, I don’t want to make social posts and create designs. Writing the newsletters will improve my skills more. So I have to become good and quick at making social media posts and write as much as I can. It is a non-paid internship, so I won’t work long if they do not offer me a salary.
Lastly, the bad news: my back sucks. I’ve been sitting and standing wrongly for a looong time and my back became so hard to be cured. The doctor said I have to go through medications for 2 years, change my bad habits, and constantly do workouts to mend my back. Fuckkk, I’m gonna spend a lor of money on medication again. Mom and I believed many doctors and failed over the last 2 years. Although I think ‘Why me? Why I can’t be like a normal, healthy person?’, I’m trying to acknowledge it and look from the bright side. I am glad that my family is able to pay for it and they don’t blame me for it. I am planning to go to swimming class because it’s also a back treatment. You can do it, nana!
I believe that I can be more effective when I’m busy. When I can’t produce enough, I get stressed. Although this internship is not related to my major, I will learn new and different things. Furthermore, I recognized that reading books and listening to useful things influence me. I try to be calm when things get confusing, stop being judgmental, and be optimistic.
22.04.21
